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Sunday, January 20, 2008

Christmas Break


It was sooo nice to be home with my family and also friends over the break. It was cool to sit around the fire ( even if was in the 60's or higher) without tv distractions and talk, play cards, read, or just relax. Also being back at my home church was amazing. Seeing everyone there was good but I wish I had more time to talk with and catch up with more people. I have a feeling this is gonna be a long post because I realized alot of things over the break and im so excited about it that its hard to shorten it by too much. So just skim through if you wanna but dont worry the next couple will be having alot more pictures because winter skills training starts in 3 days.
God used this time of rest to really show me some awesome things. I have been reading through this book about men and I got to the part talking about the warrior stage in our lives. I first read about God being a warrior and that there are certain things in life that are worth fighting for. Also, that He makes man a warrior in His image because He wants us to join Him in the battle. Then it went on to talk about the dangers of paralysis, or passivity, that has been passed on to us from Adam. This gets me so angry. It is crucial that a man gets past this tha
t lies deep in our bones. We must with the help of God, overcome it intentionally, repeatedly, on front after front across the seasons of our lives. I my heart God has placed this thought that says I will not let evil have its way. There are some things that cannot be endured. Instead of saying, why is life so hard, we take the hardness as a call to fight. Set your face like a flint like in Isaiah 50:7. It is also essential to keep the integrity of the heart as a great reservoir or passionate strength and Holy desire. I pray that myself and other guys let God awaken the warrior in us and restore that heart in me, that we would be His, ready to serve. Also that after getting past fear or doubt to serve we may fight one battle at a time and not be lured into fighting battles that are not ours to be involved in.
I was a really nervous to be honest to read the next section because i didnt want to rush into it and it was called the Lover. I realized that I have been awakening other passions in my life for quite a while and are now becoming more real than ever. The things that I love in life such as music and song, or viewing Gods created beauty and now being able to purely look at and appreciate them like never before.  Women uniquely display the personification of beauty, are the personification of beauty, and it often takes her to turn a young guys attention away from battle. The battle is not what its all about. Great memories remain with me of wading in the middle of a river and fly fishing with fish jumping out of the water around me. Also recently, our night hike through the Rockies on a moonless night with no headlamps and then sleeping under the those same stars not wanting to close my eyes even in exhaustion because I didnt want to miss a single falling star. I'll never forget seeing for the first time the sheepfold (aka the big dipper), and Cassiopeia in the sky after having them pointed out to me by one who I truly admire. What is greater than the intense desire, the piercing joy of beauty? My pursuit of Beauty had turned into Gods pursuit of me. God as a lover romancing me, stirring my heart those times ( I know it sounds weird). I realize that God has many such gifts for each of us, all particular and customized for us. I pray that He will open our hearts to His romance and to see the things that He desires to show us.
Then things all of a sudden clicked in me as I read on. For we must remember: the battle is for the Romance. What we fight for is the freedom and healing that allow us to have the intimacy with God we were created to enjoy. To drink from His river of delights ( I love those kinds of phrases). I just now began to see a connection between the warrior and lover and understand the phrase warrior poet. I owe sooo so much to the one who called me a warrior poet several months ago and challenged me by not telling me what that meant. How sweet it has been to hear it from God. 
Wow another long posts, I gotta quite that. There is so much more to both of those sides and I have been so amazed at them that its hard to shorten it down. I take alot of those words out of the way of the wild heart so I can better express what I have been learning. i continue to pray that God will awaken both sides of me and guard my heart for whatever He has in store for me. 



9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yeah - that's a start man. Enjoy the snow and the below zero temps. We had snow as well. Make sure you teach those folks about snow ice cream! Love ya fella Daddy

Anonymous said...

you know the only reason I noticed the new post was because the 'leave a comment' thing. Yeah, it was bigger than the entry. I'm not sure what I think about this :-P but at least its better than nothing...though erin's did have lots of pictures. Oh I thought of you- my major department in school was having this come watch the office and hang out night. I mean I didn't go, but I still thought of you.

Anonymous said...

Oooo a full post now :)
I'm really confused, it says its the same date but now it says a lot more than just 'hello' like it did last time i left a comment..oh well. this is exciting

tin can photography said...

how fun that you...dare i say it...are enjoying reading and having words jump off pages and into your life? maybe after a little more training i'll send a romantic nature poem your way-haha!

i've been using my new jacket pretty much every day. and when i come inside i don't want to take it off b/c it's comfortable too. but then i get scared my body will get used to the temperature inside with the jacket on, and it will ruin its affect for proper outdoor use...so i take it off.

Sarah&Jason said...

Glad you are back, safe and sound, and figuring a few things out along the way. Nice blog, cousin kyle!

VanessaMarie said...

kyle this is amazing. Although we talk about this stuff often, I really enjoy just reading through all your thoughts. You have a way with words and making your thoughts come alive for me. I pray God continues to speak to you through what you are reading, and through your daily walk with Him He is preparing you for something exciting!

Anonymous said...

Kyleman! Enjoy reading bout your adventures! We miss you "at da carwash!" Dana

Anonymous said...

How blessed I am!! I have the most wonderful grandchildren. I am so proud of you Kyle and I thank God for watching over you and guiding you. You are maturing so much.
Love MeMaw

Anonymous said...

Hey dude
I ran across your blog online and find it very interesting. I too have read wild at heart and have gone further to read captivating (recommend it).i find it interesting you talk about adams passivisity in this world.it is so true.the men of this new generation are getting stuck in a rut.so many men are leaving our women on their own and forcing them to have to step on their own behalf.they are the resemblence of Gods beauty;but its sad that so many men tell them 'i love you,but i cant be with you; but i wont leave you & that should be enough'.I just had a friend exuberating this characteristic & have a high horse on this thought.so many godly men are being pulled into this idea. the pictures and ideas on nature are awesome,hope you are learning a lot from it all. good luck